Wednesday, April 28, 2010

All Is Quiet Upstairs

A new follower!!!!! Thanks Elaine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gibson was eerily quiet this morning. We've opted to remove the baby gate that leads upstairs. He enjoys climbing the steps and he's quite agile even with his sippy cup, blankie, and Pup Pup. The other morning I was taking a shower and he greeted me with a plate of scrambled eggs I had made for him minutes earlier. He lost not one chunk of egg on his way up!

Someone forgot to flush the toilet and Gibby had a hay day playing in soggy toilet paper, smearing it all over the floor and walls..gross! Lola's favorite quote lately, "I'll never understand babies!" On one particularly exasperating day she quipped "Well, he can't get any worse."

Gibby will enter day care sometime in mid June, two days. It will give me a bit of a break and spend some quality time with Lola. We've decided not to enroll her in her day care's summer camp, instead have her home to have fun at the lake and play dates with friends. I may regret this decision. She can be a handful, very temperamental, and prone to over reacting to situations.

Through some intervention we've learned she may have SID, Sensory Integration Dysfuncion. Yea, I know...very scary to me! The term defines someone who has difficulty with processing sensory input. It has to do with the central nervous system not operating smoothly and Lola working super hard to integrate her senses. Children with poor sensory processing are more likely to over react to everyday stuff, lose control, and take longer to calm down after a tantrum. We took her to an occupational therapist who determined her core strength and balance are rated low. In a nutshell, all of these things are tied together.

The more I'm reading up on this stuff, the more "Ah Ha!" moments I'm having. She is craving more stimulation because she lacks these stimulus feelings elsewhere. She's incredibly loud, and dramatic and playful. Her "I GOTTA BE ME!" moments as I like to call them. She tends to freak out at the movies because of the loud trailers shown before the movie. Her shirt sleeves have to have a certain length, now she hates wearing leggings, she battled last winter with her teachers over snow pants and boots, she hates, HATES, having her fingernail and toenails clipped, she has recently gotten over her fear of scissors and had her tresses trimmed. Again, these all have to do with heightened senses and her ability to process them (or so I am trying to puzzle together?)

In short, a bit of a modulation issue...different kids have different temperaments and most times hers clashes with mine. Great learning tool for me, to model my reaction to what is really going on with her, figuring out why she is really hesitant to try something or defiant on some days, wanting all control most days.

It's Sunday night, and we've just had an enormous battle getting Lola to bed. I set the timer and said ten more minutes. She screamed, had a raging hissy fit and said she hated her life. I have to be firm and show no emotion. She's had a big weekend. I'm hoping she doesn't wake Gibby up. This post has taken me several days to write which is not the norm, usually I bang one out.

I'm going to stick to my parental guns, seek help, and continue reading my books from Amazon. Lola's school behaviorist stopped by Thursday for a visit. I love her insight and she truly loves kids and agrees Lo is a fantastic kid. Who wouldn't? She is!!!!!

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Iggy Pop at 62 - Times Online

Iggy Pop at 62 - Times Online still have my heart! Lola picked out her own clothes this morning. A vintage Rolling Stones T shirt and a cute pair of denim capris with embroidered flowers down the leg. She wanted to know if she could wear my old Ray Bans to school. Of course!

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

I Love You This Much

Spent over an hour trying to assemble ZhuZhu Pet Condos and a slide! I sat cross legged (Indian style as it was once referred to, before the PC Police started busting heads!) on the floor until there was no feeling in my legs. Kinda had this floating feeling as if I had reached a higher level of consciousness. No, I realized, just loss of circulation to the lower extremities!

Nugget and Mr. Squiggles are a hit. The best part, you don't have to feed them or clean out their cages. They are battery run hamsters who squeak and chirp and talk to each other and run along tunnels and rooms of elaborate homes (some assembly required....) Gibson and Lo spent at least an hour last night, playing peacefully with them.

There is also a grotesque amount of Bubber tracked through the house too. A bit like Moon Sand, a bit like Playdoh, feels great to mush and squish it together!!! Very therapeutic. Great colors, never dries out, supposedly gluten free and non toxic. Why gluten free? It's a floor wax, it's a dessert topping!

Lo's Luau is this weekend at the YMCA. More gifts, more mayhem. Mayhem is her favorite word lately. Poop seems to be the most popular this week. She's singing all songs about poop. It's a phase, I know.

She asked me last night if I love her more than Gibson. I love you both all the time, all with my heart I told her. "Don't you love me more because I was born first?" I wonder if she was asking pecking order or if the question had more to do with Gibson and his adoption. "I'll show you, look," I drew a heart on the back of a piece of scrap paper. "This is my heart." I drew a line down the center of the heart to show two halves. "One side is for you and one side is for Gibby."

"That makes sense." She was off to the living room to play with her ZhuZhu Pets.

Monday, April 19, 2010

High 5 Lola Rose!

Monday morning. Lola and Gibson are watching The Squeakquel (Alvin and the Chipmunks) upstairs in Lo's room. All is relatively quiet for now so I'll blog as long as time (or the impending smell of smoke or shattering glass) allows!

Today is Lola Rose's 5Th birthday!!!!! 5 WOW!!!!!!!!! I remember the day so clearly. It was a Tuesday and I had a doctor visit scheduled that morning. Around 3 AM I had to pee, I waddled to the bathroom and peed, and peed, and continued to pee. Then it dawned on me...HOLY CRAP, MY WATER BROKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I climbed back into the warm bed. Sean stirred, "Everything OK?" he sleepily mumbled. "Yeah, my water just broke." I was oddly calm. We both fell back to sleep.

I woke to the smell of coffee. Sean was downstairs on the phone calling work. I showered, dressed, makeup the whole sha-bang. Guess what? I was four centimeters dilated at the doctor's office. "Today is the day folks!" We were told to come back when contractions began. Back home, more phone calls. Sean made me eat a bowl of granola with sliced bananas. "Honey, honey, Sean, I need you!!" The contractions were overwhelming. Simultaneously I felt like my head and pelvis were being sent on opposite roller coaster rides. I was having a hell of a time breathing. "EEEhhhh OOhhhhhh EEEEhhhhhh OOOOhhhhhhhhhh," back to the doctor. Who's this puffed up pinata of a woman?

Family was on the way to Massachusetts from Pennsylvania. We settled into the delivery room. Drips, IVs, monitor machines. Nurses names written, erased and rewritten on the dry board all afternoon. My midwives coming and going. Doctors peeking in, prying open, prodding, poking...This had been a long journey. Two years of fertility treatments, a high risk pregnancy, five months doctor ordered bed rest: we were READY TO HAVE THIS BABY!

The anesthesiologist came in to play pin the tail on the puffy ladies back. Third time a charm! Bingo! I was psyched about the patient controlled epidural, the first for this hospital! I was happy, scared, anxious, giddy. Sean was by my side with that goofy Christmas morning glow! Several hours later I was given a pre flight cocktail. Soooooo nice. I was Shecky Green cracking jokes with the nurses. "I'll be here for the next three days, thank you, thank you, try the roast beef on your way out!"

Flowers were being delivered by the armloads. The room was filling up with fragrance and sun. We opened the windows, I could hear the street traffic below. OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH....Dress rehearsal is now over! Now I was really uncomfortable!!! Sean's Mom popped into view. "SURPRISE WE'RE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!" She blew into the room followed by my quieter Mom and Dad. Hugs, kisses, flurry of how was the trip, etc...I promised myself I would not cry when I saw my parents. Too late. The pain was fast and furious, a train wreck inside my body. I heard the nurse say "Are you alright?" She was addressing my mom who looked rather pasty and limp. Mom was escorted out of the room and passed out in the doorway. Dad and Mom were in the room next door recuperating as I gave birth.

I kept my eyes closed almost the entire time and held on rabidly to Sean's fingers. He had to take his watch and wedding band off because my grip was so severe. I couldn't remember how to breath and I felt I was drowning. I was flailing in murky black water. Somehow my body knew what to do and took over, I cried out in a rhythm that carried me onward. An internal song I didn't know I knew how to recite. A pushing, a pulling, a straining, a burning, tearing, release, relief. 8:23 PM, Lola burst onto the scene; big, healthy, pink 8 pound 8 ounces and 22 inches long!

Magically pizza was delivered to the room. Champagne was popped. I was being stitched up. Third degree tears and three minute long contractions. Shouldn't balloons and confetti be falling from the ceiling? Ah, but we had our prize didn't we. Happy Birthday Lola Rose :)


Friday, April 16, 2010

Out of the Mouth of Lola


All pirates are Canadian, so says Lola. I asked her where she heard this and she said she read it in the newspaper!

She's also convinced Gibson is either Chinese or a "Mexico" baby? She has this fascination with Mexico and Hawaii lately. "Why do you think Gibson is Chinese," I asked. "Because he eats noodles and fortune cookies." Oh, OK? Gibson has never had a fortune cookie and dislikes the texture of spaghetti.

She also gave me the run down on how prison works. "You do something bad and you get locked up. Then you have to wait, just be patient and the judge comes to your cage and lets you out." It seems a friend of Lola's in daycare has a Daddy who is in jail. Very matter of fact Lola shrugged and said, "You just have to wait your time out."

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Sunshine On My Shoulder Makes Me Cry

What an amazing, gorgeous day today is! Gibby and I walked downtown to check out the new coffee place and Raven Used Books. We walked over to the Greenfield Energy Park to soak up some rays. Gibson had a great time climbing in, out and over the wooden stationary train.

Gaggles of people were out. Business men in suits leaving the courthouse, people dropping off mail, cafes opening up, shopkeepers Windexing their front windows, two women conversing in sign language sitting in front of Siren Cafe; sipping coffee. There are two guys who sit out in front of Greenfields Market and ask for change. Today's special at La Petite Cafe, turkey club with lettuce, tomato, Swiss cheese and cranberry relish. New construction at The Puskin building caused pedestrian backup on the sidewalk, as did a young woman wearing teeny tiny shorts with cowboy boots. Women with their yoga mats and eco friendly water bottles were coming out of the studio, stepping into the bright sun and the chorus of steady beeping of the garbage trucks.

I watched Gibby play and wave occasionally at me, peeking through the wooden windows of the train. Every so often he would make sure I was still there. I was thinking how lucky I am, how today is this glorious day, a gift. I worried it would all too soon end. I worried there may not be a tomorrow. I began to worry for the safety of my children. I worried the earth or the sun, or some planet would stop spinning on its axis and this monstrous orb would fall flaming from the sky. Sometimes the day is just too perfect and I wonder what will happen next?

Thursday, April 8, 2010

A Day Without Spongebob

For once it's relatively peaceful at 6 PM on Madison Circle. Usually it's a bedlam of Spongebob Squarepants, noisy toys, and Lola and Gibby competing for air time! There's a flurry of after school snacks, drawing paper, crayons, kicked off sandy shoes and who said something nasty to someone else or what was gross for lunch. "What's that gooey brown stuff they give you on a bun?" I have to say her menu at school is impressive, from chicken teriyaki, stuffed shells, sloppy joes, and assorted fresh veggies and fruits. Healthy snacks twice a day? Not a bad deal.

There were no cartoons today after school. Lola hit Gibby in the face because Gibby was after her toothbrush this morning. I heard him cry and saw him rubbing his cheek. We do not under ANY circumstance tolerate hitting! I told Lola to apologize to Gibson and no cartoons when she was home from school. "Mommy do you still love me?" "Yes, I do, but I'm very sad that you hit Gibby when you should have used your words and taken your toothbrush back."

As soon as we were home she asked for a piece of her Easter candy. The next request, cartoons. "Mom said no because you hit Gibby this morning. This is your consequence for hitting." I was impressed and surprised there was no gnashing and wailing. She and Gibby took their baths then played downstairs with books. I turned on the radio and we had a dance party. Lola taught me a new dance called "The Wedding." You hold each other very close and stiff like it's your first school dance and you're scared shit less. She's growing up way too fast!